Track Your Life with Boyd Varty - Episodes Tagged with “Tree”

Day 40 - Searching for the Spirit of the Great Heart

Boyd Varty — Mon, 11 May 2020 07:00:00 +0200

And then all of sudden we were there. The face of the people I love. Saying goodbye with immense gratitude to the tree and this beautiful place on the river. The last dawn from inside this experience on the river. I know this is not the end but the beginning. You will be hearing from me. There is so much life for us all to live. I’m not going to try and summarize of sign off well. I have said what I need to say. I will leave you with an anthem by the late great South Africa Johnny Clegg. Volume up, listen to the words:

The world is full of strange behavior
Every man has to be his own savior
I know I can make it on my own if I try
But I'm searching for a great heart to stand me by
Underneath the African sky
A great heart to stand me by

I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
To hold and keep me by
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
Under African sky
Sometimes I feel that you really know me
Sometimes there's so much you can show me

There's a highway of stars across the heavens
There's whispering song of the wind in the grass
There's the rolling thunder across the savanna
A hope and dream at the edge of the sky
And your life is a story like the wind
Your life is a story like the wind

I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
To hold and stand me by
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
Under African sky
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
I see the fire in your eyes
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
That beats my name inside
Sometimes I feel that you really know me
Sometimes there's so much you can show me

I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
(Guka 'mzimba, sala 'nhliziyo)
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
(Guka 'mzimba, sala 'nhliziyo)
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
To hold and stand me by
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
Under African sky

I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
(Guka 'mzimba, sala 'nhliziyo)
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
(Guka 'mzimba, sala 'nhliziyo)
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart
(Guka 'mzimba, sala 'nhliziyo)
I'm searching for the spirit of the great heart

Songwriters: Jonathan Paul Clegg
Great Heart lyrics © Rhythm Safari Pty Ltd
https://www.johnnyclegg.com

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Day 39 - Reflection

Boyd Varty — Sun, 10 May 2020 09:00:00 +0200

A ceremony is a place to remember to remember. As I walk through my last 39 days I have a lot to reflect on. I remember the resistance that arose before leaving home. I remember the anxiety of the first few days when six weeks seemed like an eternity. I must remember to sit with anxiety with compassion. I remember the feeling of a shell being taken off after one week. How do I work with this after I return back? Optimization for me comes out of consistency. I must remember to sometimes just start.

All through the day I intend to reflect on all these moments. In my experience re-entry is its own journey and art form. You have to remember that in change processes we spiral forward. We sometimes go back but on a different rung on the spiral.
The key is to notice yourself, watch yourself and pay attention without judgement. That will create the awareness to shift from.

Our inner world shapes our outer world. Imagination, creativity, enchantment, tracking, storytelling and pattern interruption. Nature is the deepest teacher.

The gratitude I feel for the land here is impossible to put into words. Beauty to the point where I feel overwhelmed. Elephants, rhinos, leopards, starry skies, storms. I will miss the elephants mid-morning arrival at the river. And of course the tree is a love story all of its own. I have been a part of its ecosystem all on my own. This tree has taught me so much. It has been the host of one of the most transformational experiences of my life. In native cultures everything is alive, it is a being and I understand that now. This tree has been a true friend and will continue to be.

In gratitude I also turn to all of you who came along for the ride and sent me notes of support. To be able to do this alone and with you was perfect. We are all connected. We know why we are here. To learn to heal to bring back the new old ways. To have fun and reach out and not let it all be too serious and to remember what living actually is.

What if what we made here is the real world. The most natural scape is the real world. Its just a deep sense of the sacred which makes me reflective. Jesus is often depicted with his eyes open. Buddha is often shown with his eyes closed. In truth we need contemplation in action. No enlightenment has any power unless it is lived.

I am also full of a very simple desire to do the best work I can do towards the transformation of consciousness. Today I am going to run as far as I can. Slowly relishing the feeling of the land under me. I am going to swim in the river and sit by the fire. There is a time to reflect on our reflections and PS its probably good I’m close to the end as I have a tooth that is killing me.

I guess the lasting question is that in a matter of time, all of our lives will go back to normal. What do we want that normal to be? The treehouse is like a nest, my books tarpaulin, clothes and yoga mat is all around me. It’s quiet in the way of nature where the sounds make the silence rather than break it.

Covid has been so hard for so many people but it also gave me a glimpse back in time. This reserve has been an empty Eden and I am Adam. What will it mean in 30 years to have lived with wild animals? Will it all be gone or will be wake up? Would you find it very hard to understand if I said that I’m learning to be at peace with both? Wherever we land, it will be there.

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Day 29 - Pattern Tracking

Boyd Varty — Thu, 30 Apr 2020 10:00:00 +0200

Wonderful encounters continue around the camp. Two young rhino bulls made their way past camp and after a short while I got on the tracks for some fun. They led me on the southern bank of the river. Past a Sausage tree and Apple leaf when I heard growling from 50 meters back from where I had come. The growling escalated and I immediately knew it was the mating leopards from the other day. My gratitude for this spot and the experiences it has given me is impossible to state. I love this tree.

I was feeling pretty good when the dark clouds began to build and a mini trauma pattern played out. Introjection followed by projection. Psychologically I returned back to the other night and I felt like I was in the storm already. Bad decisions were made and trauma starts to create itself leaving me feeling isolated and anxious fearing the worst. It played out for about 15 minutes before I was able to interrupt it.

Part of dealing with trauma is understanding the physiology of trauma. Notice my adrenals are activated. Ask myself what is actually happening now. Move to some kind of self care - what do I need right now? Radio for a weather report. Create a different outcome for yourself - this involved getting everything covered in tarps and then watching the dark shapes in the mountains move in.

Learning to map and interrupt trauma patterns creates totally different branches of lives. In hundreds of ceremonies this has become my art form. To map and interrupt patterns to create different outcomes for people.

Patterns can become more intricate and complex as the scope of the trauma becomes deeper. Anger turned inward becomes self loathing which becomes depression. Interrupt the anger to restore boundaries and re-establish value. It requires looking at suffering in a much more interconnected way much like an ecosystem.

Map your pattern, play with learning to create new outcomes for yourself.

What past is in this moment
Notice what your body is doing
Ask yourself What do you need?
Reach out for support. It’s hard to see a pattern from inside it.

I get excited about it as a tracker as its all about how the pattern is laid down. We can learn with attention and all become pattern trackers. I’ve been thinking about how all the mystics found a way of living and then shared the peace and joy of that way. The doctrine often came after their lives. I have found a way to live here that is simple and peaceful. I have made a home in it, but is it making a home in me?

Purposeful action towards and unknown purpose. I don’t know where I’m going but I know exactly how to get there.

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Day 12 - Learning To See

Boyd Varty — Mon, 13 Apr 2020 10:00:00 +0200

Modem life is built on a truth and a lie.
Excerpt from Braiding Sweet Grass, a beautiful book about indigenous wisdom, scientific knowledge and the teaching of plant. The land is the real teacher all we need is mindfulness.

It is surprising to me how much time giraffes spend down by the river. Like an artist I’m trying to see things differently. I look beyond them walking to a geometry.

The trick to transformational processes is how to interrupt and shape patterns, in order to do this you must look at the spaces between things. How everything is touching everything else in relation.

Down in the river the leopards continue their passions. I have not felt compelled to go and find them.
To go and seek them out now seems kind of impolite.

I’m developing a theory on why mystics went to nature. Imagine you are two people: a fanatic city dweller and a wild person. When the mystic goes to nature they find that wild person who knows a different rhythm. The one that gets attention becomes abiding.

Today my body was tired and I ebbed into a lower level of frequency.

In my masculine excitement I’m drawn to activity, but right now its the meditation that is calling me.

A side note on tracking. Right now it seems that all four of the prides of lions that frequent the Londolozi are on neighboring properties. There is an air of excitement about this at it means that they will be sure to return in a couple of days.

Learning to See: A many called Ken Tinley once tuaght my father how to see a tree. There is a difference between how something works and what it means.

“When you look at a tree, see the soil that holds it. Understand that soil feeds it and the tree also enriches the soil. It’s shade invites shade grass and its stem alkalizes fruit which bring in monkeys which cause leave to fall which cause antelope to browse below.

Wouldn’t it be interesting iff we all spent some time looking at nature this way. Or at your relationships or garden.

In native culture, ceremonies are a time to remember what we remember.
How something works and what it means are different things.

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